he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
