he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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