I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
