she was so not down for the gang bang
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize