I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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