I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
