fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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