i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Randomize
