And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize