I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize