butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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