I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize