Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize