3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
