before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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