I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
