guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize