I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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