Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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