You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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