Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
