I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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