I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
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