we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
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