the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
He did a backflip because drugs
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
