Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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