just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
