how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
