haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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