OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize