ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
