Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize