stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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