Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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