Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
