in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
my phone needs a breathalizer
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize