Midget sex pt 2 tonight
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
