Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize