someone threw a dead crab at me
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I wish i was in the wii world.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
