By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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