Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
