I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
