Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
