so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
