There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
