What a fucking waste of an outfit
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
