ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
