We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
