Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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