break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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